2 Months

Can't believe 2 months have already flown by although my days and weeks seem to go slower than what I really want it to. There are some things we finally got settled in the last month especially for myself. Officially got my tooth luxated...again(3rd time)! The oral surgeon said he got great movement and had some hope that my tooth is going to move in...stubborn thing. This tooth has been so stubborn and has tested my patience the most. I physically and mentally am exhausted at this point about it and I am so over it. Though when an oral surgeon gives me hope I want to believe it will be all worth it, although it's been officially 3 1/2 years since I have had braces on. More torture than I have even anticipated and still have almost 2 years to go. I have also officially confirmed by new orthodontist after searching for a month! Thank goodness the search is over and I am hoping he can move things a long. I went to see him on monday and they got to pull on the tooth more after the surgery(painful). They are trying a different approach from my other orthodontist in hoping this approach has more power to pull in this sucker! Not to mention I have a deformity in my tooth aka hole in the inside of it...hoping that it's just anatomical and that I can get if fixed once it is in. I am still hoping it is in good shape or I have went through too many surgeries and pain for one tooth. The orthodontist assistant told me that if this approach to pulling in this tooth doesn't work then there is no more hope to keep pulling on it. So here is to hoping or there will be many decisions to make whether to extract it, bridge it, put a implant in or possibly crowning the tooth OR just pulling it and just shoving my other teeth over and no one know that I have a missing canine tooth. Which in reality I would rather do the last option bc it cost a lot less. Oh, the anticipation of waiting for one tooth. Not only do I have to endure this but the next step is maybe to put an expander in....ugh! Meaning it sits on the roof of my mouth and helps expand the arch to make it back to normal, since it went out of whack trying to pull in my tooth. So much going on in my mouth and want it to be finally over so I can smile and have more confidence in myself again.

Speaking of confidence, I am trying to find a new me. A me that finally says I don't really care what other people think of me. You either like me or you don't. I just want to be me, no make-up or make-up, dressed up or not dressed up. Not sure why I have always felt the pressure of wanting acceptance from other people. In Lexington, I would always look decent going out in public and always, ALWAYS had make-up on. Now, that I am in Vegas "no one" knows me so I can just be myself and not worry about what other people think. In Lexington, I was always afraid I would run into someone I would know or hadn't seen in years wanted to look great just in case I ran into them...haha! So silly, right? Here, I feel as if I don't need to impress anyone. As long as my husband thinks I am beautiful and loves me then I have no worries. I am accepted by my family and future friends then they know the real me. Plus, I am a mama and I do want to dress up and put make up on but it's because it makes me feel better about myself not to just impress someone. I still try to look nice for church bc it's my only time I get to really look nice, the other days I am just lounging around in my athletic shorts and t-shirts and thats who I really am. I also want to make a goal to get in shape and lose some body fat because it would make me feel better about myself and regain some confidence. I do like to work out but it's been difficult this past month because of my tooth surgery. So once it heals a little better, hopefully by next week I will get started going to the gym here at the apartment. I plan to babysit and then go work out on the days Tim has to close at work and then get ready for the day to take care of baby girl.

Another thing I have struggled with the past couple of weeks is missing home. There are days where I desperately wish I was still living in Lexington so I can still go see my family every week. Every week I would see my mom as least twice if not three times because Kaelyn would stay with my mom while I worked during the week. Now, I don't have that privilege to just up in leave on a day that I am bored at home to go see my family in Nicholasville. 2 months has been the longest I have been away from home. I love that I can talk to my mom on the phone but of course seeing your family is so different than talking to them. So, not sure if this whole home sickness will go away any time soon or if it will at all but I know I will have the strength to keep going by focusing on the Lord and what He is doing in our lives and keeping busy on a daily busy! 

Things that are happening in our church, WE ARE GROWING! In fact two weeks ago our pastor said he is anticipating to hit 800 people in the fall and may be adding an extra service. Wow! We are growing so much that we are always looking for extra hands to help set up and tare down after church services since we are currently in a high school. It's exciting to see our church grow and seeing that we are truly reaching our community! It's great to see and be apart of what God has going on in North Las Vegas area. Coming up we have a Servolution event on Labor day weekend so look for updates on that soon!